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November 26, 2014

14 Ridiculous Local TV Ads

Local TV ads: everyone loves ‘em, every town has ‘em. Hilarious, bizarre, embarrassing, or sometimes—if we’re lucky—downright offensive, people tend to remember and talk about these quirky ads so much that they become part of their civic identity. We bond over common knowledge of stupid theme songs and catch phrases. And now, thanks to the internet, these precious relics of our consumer culture are no longer confined to the local television markets in which they originated. So here are 14 of the best local TV ads you can find out there. Let us know what you think, and if there are any classics we might have missed.

14. 1-800-2sellHomes – Oklahoma City, OK
Local Commercial Tip #1: hire terrible actors. If they can’t remember simple lines and have to read them off of cue cards? Perfect. If they read with the inflection of a 5th grader? Even better.

13. Martin Fine Furniture Store – Indianapolis, IN
For some reason, local furniture salesmen have no pride whatsoever.

and…

and one more…

12. Schweig Engel Furniture & Appliance – St. Louis, MO
Um, ditto what I just said about #13 above.

11. Norton Furniture – Cleveland, OH
And, yeah, ditto again.

also…

10. Oliver Jewellery – Toronto, ON
Catchy song? Check. Spoken with urgency? Check. Catch phrase? check. This guy belongs in the Local Commercial Hall of Fame.

and…

9. Mo Money Taxes – Jackson, MS
Local Commercial Tip #2: be vague. Don’t let possible customers figure out exactly what it is you do, or what services you provide.

8. Harrelson Toyota – Rock Hill, SC
“South Carolina’s #1 Butt Satisfier”

7. Dirt Cheap Beer and Liquor – St. Louis, MO
Man, this one is a classic. So many nuggets of complete awesomeness. For example, “the more she drinks, the better you look.” The guy’s a poet.

6. Valley Ball Strip Club – Van Nuys, CA
If these guys objectify women in their club half as well as they do in this commercial, business must be booming!

5. Hispanic Achievers Job Fair – Orlando, FL
Here are two people who don’t need to go to the job fair, what with their amazing acting skills. I totally believed they were unemployed Hispanic Americans.

4. Moo & Oink – Chicago, IL
Just how I like my meat: personified and dancing.

3. Mr. Spriggs BBQ – Midwest City, OK
Little known fact: over 70% of slow jams are, in fact, inspired by pulled pork.

2. Georgia Car Credit – Moultri, GA
Local Commercial Tip #3: try to be racially insensitive. People like it when you promulgate negative stereotypes of races other than your own, so really ham it up.

and this one too

1. TDM Auto Sales – High Point, NC
“I’m a Cuban Gynecologist and American auto salesman.”