February 11, 2016

11 Creative Examples of Ex’s Getting Revenge

People have always enjoyed taking revenge against former lovers that have done them wrong, and the internet has made this catharsis easier than ever. However, there’s no class in simply posting naked pictures or videos of an ex on some porn site. Sure, it may be the ultimate humiliation, but really it makes you look just as bad as them, or worse. And besides, anyone can spread naked photos and videos, assuming they have the goods. Real revenge geniuses aren’t crass, they’re creative. They use imagination and sometimes a little know-how to make their former-lovers squirm. These of the kinds of revenges we’re going to celebrate here with this list of 11 Examples of Creative Ex Revenge.

11. For Sale on eBay: Cheating Wife

In May 2008, Paul Osborned, 44, discovered his wife of 24 years and mother of his two children, Sharon, 43, was cheating on him. Since he made the discovery in a very modern way—snooping around in her email—it seems he figured it would only be appropriate to exact revenge in a very modern way: by listing his cheating wife for sale on eBay. As you would expect, the police do not find it humorous when one human being tries to sell another human being. Hopefully he found a lawyer who can handle both his divorce and his human trafficking-related legal troubles.

10. Stupidest Man Alive Caught on Facebook

Valeria and Antonio were to have a medium sized wedding by Italian standards—only 548 guests. But that was before the bride-to-be discovered a picture of him with a pair of naked boobies on his head, right there on his Facebook profile. Adultery is always stupid, but posting the evidence on Facebook is even stupider. Interestingly, Valeria and her friends went old-school with their revenge, plastering posters of the doofus all over town. They read, “Thank goodness for Facebook! At least I discovered it in time before the wedding that you’re a traitorous pig!”

9. For Sale: Porsche. Slightly Used.

When a woman from just outside Birmingham, UK, came home one night to find her husband “interacting” with their teenaged baby sitter—in the garage, in his Porsche 911—the only logical thing she could do was sell that Porsche on British classifieds site Gumtree.com. And of course, it was priced to move, as they say. Worth at least $100,000, she listed it for just $3,500. Though to be fair, given that there are probably a few stains on the leather upholstery, she probably wouldn’t have been able to get more than $20,000 anyway.

8. Jilted Wife Sells Adultery Evidence on eBay

Here’s another case of a saucy wife taking to the internet to scorn her cheating ex. In this case, the unnamed Australian woman came home from work early to catch her husband with another woman in their bed. Well, actually, the other woman wasn’t there. But “the tart’s knickers” were, along with a naked husband and an empty condom wrapper. So the woman listed said underwear and condom wrapper for sale on eBay. When eBay informed her of their policy prohibiting the sale of used underwear—which is another issue altogether—she changed the listing, instead offering to sell just a photograph of the undies and wrapper.

7. Garage Sale Shaming

The sign really says it all.

6. Man Has Ex Deported

Well, he tried to have her deported, anyway. Fernanda Romero, a mildly attractive 28 year-old model and actress from Mexico, married 28 year-old pizza delivery ma—er, aspiring musician—Kent Ross of Los Angeles in order to obtain a green card. Soon afterward she began dating and eventually moved in with photographer Markus Klinko of New York, who knew of her phony marital status. When Romero broke up with Klinko, she and her legal husband found themselves in legal trouble. Yep, the ex-boyfriend called immigration and reported them. Now Romero and Kent Ross face up to 5 year in prison, and she could be deported. Lesson: if you lie to the government about being married, try not to draw attention to yourself by being a really hot actress.

5. A Beatle’s Revenge

This one falls into the category of hearsay, since one the key players involved is deceased and the other may just be an attention-seeking actress. If true, it’s a pretty crazy revenge story. So here it is: in the late 60s George Harrison of the Beatles and Eric Clapton, then of Cream, were best friends, despite the fact that everyone, including Harrison, knew Clapton had a thing for Harrison’s wife, Patti Boyd. When Harrison’s marriage to Boyd hit the rocks and the two broke up, Clapton finally got what he wanted, and the two quickly shacked up. Now fast-forward to 1991. Clapton is married to Italian actress Lory Del Santo when they experience tragedy: their 4 year-old son dies, falling out the window of their 53rd story Manhattan apartment. According to Del Santo, Clapton becomes emotionally distant and shuts her out of his life. So, three months later, she sleeps with George Harrison. Or so Lory Del Santo claimed in a 2007 book. According to Clapton’s ex, both she and George Harrison were seeking revenge for wrongs done to them by Clapton. However, Del Santo says Clapton never knew about the affair…until now, of course. If true, that’s one hell of a revenge, waiting 20 years until the death of your friend’s son, then nailing his wife.

4. Ex-Girlfriend Embarrassed Live on C-Span

C-Span is usually the second-most lame channel on basic cable, surpassed in lameness only by its little brother, C-Span 2. However, on October 6, 2010, shit got real. Kind of. On a televised discussion of a book about conservativism in America, one of the panelists, Todd Seavey, unloads on another panelist, Helen Rittelmeyer, who just happens to be his ex-girlfriend…and it sitting right next to him. Of course, no one was actually watching live when Mr. Seavey accused Ms. Rittelmeyer of being a floozy, but thanks to Youtube this moment of sweet revenge will live forever.

3. Youtube Revenge…Backfires

When a rich New York theatre producer decided to divorce his much-younger actress and playwright wife, Tricia Walsh, she went nutso and made several vicious Youtube rants against the man and his family. Why? Well, Walsh was pissed that her husband insisted she move out of their Park Avenue apartment. Even though the two had a rock-solid prenuptial agreement that said she would have to move out if they got divorced. And even though, as compensation, Walsh would be paid $750,000. Ironically, she claims in the videos that the prenup was invalid because he did not have grounds for a divorce; however, a judge ruled that by making the videos, Walsh gave her husband very good grounds for a divorce. Oops.

My favorite part of this whole saga comes from the second video. She tries to justify her actions, by saying, “I needed to get attention to my plight…” Um, since when has having to move out of a Park Avenue apartment a “plight”? Starving in Africa: a plight. Having a child with terminal illness: a plight. Having to move from the Upper East Side to the Upper West Side: not a plight.

2. The Jack Weppler Story: Web-Savvy Revenge

We don’t know the details. We only know some kid named Jack Weppler broke up with his tech-savvy girlfriend, and she didn’t like it. So she went to a website that specializes in rigging Google search results (memegenerator.net) and uploaded a bunch of photos of poor Jack with funny and/or embarrassing comments written all over them. Now, when you search for “Jack Weppler,” these photos come up first. Apparently his mom wrote a letter to Google, saying Jack is a minor, you gotta remove the pics, and all that stuff. But that is pretty much impossible. So, sorry Jack Weppler, you’re an internet phenomenon.

1. myexwifesweddingdress.com

When Arizona man Kevin Cotter’s wife left him after 12 years of marriage, he hatched this very creative and, judging by the advertising on his website, successful revenge plot. You see, when she packed up and move out, his ex left behind only one thing: her wedding dress. When he asked his high-school sweetheart what she expected him to do with it, she replied, “Whatever the $%^@# you want.” So he decided he would come up with 101 wacky uses for the dress and then chronicle his project on the web. With the help of family and friends, he is now up to 74 uses, which include using it as a rag to clean his soccer cleats, as a colander to strain spaghetti, as a sign to cheer on the Arizona Sun Devils, and as a scarecrow to keep the birds out of his yard.