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September 2, 2014

11 Awesome Tricked Out Lawnmowers

They say April showers bring May flowers. I say yeah, sure, but they also bring thick green grass that grows about a foot per hour. Grass that someone has to mow. The good news is, lawnmowers aren’t what they used to be. Gone are the days when you would spend twice the amount of time getting your mower to start than you would spend actually mowing your lawn. Today, mowers are highly calibrated, fine-tuned machines that are being improved all the time. Some of the improvements being made actually make the task of mowing the lawn easier. Others make lawnmowers more efficient and eco-friendly. And still others just make lawnmowers look more awesome. In other words, though mowing the lawn still sucks, it doesn’t suck as much as it used to.

11. Flymo Hovering Electric Lawnmower

Rather than reinvent the lawnmower wheel, UK company Flymo just removed them altogether. Taking their inspiration from air hockey tables, or possibly actual hovercraft, they created this little gem. No friction with between ground and mower means easy it’s easy to push. Only problem is they probably don’t work to well if your lawn is not perfectly flat.

10. Hotrod Mower

People trick out their cars. Why not their lawnmowers? After all, behind the automobile and the giant flat screen television, the lawnmower is probably the third most important status symbol for the suburban male (in some locations, it’s a tie between the lawnmower and the snowblower). We consult with male neighbors when the mower is on the fritz, and we brag when we bring home a brand new one. So why wouldn’t somebody make a hotrod mower?

9. The PimpMow 9000

This one is basically the riding version of #10. I do not know what it is actually called, but if it were mine it would be the PimpMow 9000. My favorite feature of this mower is definitely the speakers. I like how they are positioned up high, facing forward, aggressively, ready to rock the lawn (and neighbors) into submission.

8. The Atomic Yardmaster

There’s this guy named Mark Moriarity who apparently is a world-renowned restorer of classic cars and other old junk from the 50s and 60s. One day he came across a rusted out mid-century modern lawnmower and decided to fix it up nice and purty. The result is probably the best looking traditional lawnmower on this list.

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7. The Hank Hill Special

This propane powered mower was created as an environmentally friendly alternative to standard gasoline mowers without the inherent limitations (i.e. extension cords) of electric mowers. Propane mowers reduce emissions by 60% and, best of all, is generally about 30% cheaper than gasoline. America’s favorite propane salesman would be proud to call this his lawnmower.

6. Remote Controlled Mower

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Mowing your lawn can’t get any easier than this, can it? No it can’t, I say.

5. Automatic Mowers: Husqvarna AutoMower vs. The AutoLawnMow

I stand corrected. Mowing your lawn can get easier than a remote controlled mower. The only question is, which $3,000 automatic lawnmower do you go with, the Husqvarna or the AutoLawnMow? The Husqvarna certainly looks sleeker, and has a cooler commercial. But despite looking and sounding like an ad for a British retirement home, the AutoLawnMow promo does a better job explaining how the machine goes about cutting your lawn. Still, the one question I had about these mowbots—hey, why aren’t these things called mowbots?— went unanswered in both commercials: how long do they take to mow your lawn? If it rained Monday through Friday and I’m having a BBQ on Saturday, can it get the job done in a couple of hours? Because both of these look painfully slow.

4. The Casmobot Wii-Remote-Controlled Semiautomatic Lawnmower

Now here’s a robotic mower I might consider (if money were no object, which it most certainly is). I’d feel a little uneasy just plopping a blade-wielding robot down in my back yard and walking away while it wanders around aimlessly. This one, on the other hand, is easy and efficient, but also has a bit more oversight for those of us who don’t fully trust machines to run our lives. You have to option of controlling the mower the whole time with a Nintendo Wii remote, or you can define a boundary and tell the mower to cut everything within it. Awesome, right? And the best part is you would totally have every kid in your neighborhood lining up to take turns cutting your grass.

3. MowerCycle

Who says advancements in the lawnmowing arts have to be high tech? If it works and it’s easy, I say that’s a step forward. And this easy homemade system seems to simple and effective. It also gets your fat butt off the couch.

2. World’s Fastest Lawnmower

If you’re wondering why someone would trick out their riding lawnmower so that it can go 96 mph, just stick to your 20” Briggs & Stratton push mower. If, on the other hand, you like to live life to the extreme, get yourself one of these babies. Though it cannot cut grass while going 96 mph, it can indeed cut grass. If it couldn’t, then it wouldn’t be a lawnmower, and thus it couldn’t be called the fastest lawnmower in the world. Can you imagine how much your neighbors would love you if you rode this Harley-sounding thing around your yard for a couple hours each week?

1. The Husqvarna Panthera Leo

Taking the top spot in our list of tricked out lawnmowers is this futuristic prototype from Swedish motorcycle company Husqvarna. Now, I know what you’re thinking: do they even have grass in Sweden? Well, apparently so. And they make kickass mowers. This one leaves almost no carbon footprint, has ingenious innovations like a three-blade adjustable-width cutting deck, and looks like the USS Starship Enterprise. It’s not available for purchase yet, but it should be in the next five years or so. So start saving up, because you know this one will cost a pretty penny.