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September 1, 2014

12 WTF Words That Really Exist


Are you looking for a great way to impress important people in your life—people like your boss, your significant other, your parole officer? Well, study this list carefully, my friend. If you learn how to properly use all 12 of these weird words you’ll never need to call a locksmith ever again—because you’ll have the key to success! I learned them all, and now just look at me! I’m the richest and most famous writer on the internet. And why wouldn’t I be? Everyone loves dudes who use large obscure words. Am I right? So, without further ado, check out this lexicographic masterpiece.

12. Sesquipedalian

Definition: (adjective) characterized by long words; long-winded.

As In: “This list is quite sesquipedalian.”

11. Ligneous

Definition: (adjective) made, consisting of, or resembling wood; woody.

As In: “Mr. Harrelson’s name may be Woody, but Keanu Reaves is the one who’s ligneous.”

10. Infundibuliform

Definition: (adjective) funnel-shaped.

As In: “‘Hey, look out for that infundibuliform cloud!’ he said, before his whole town was wiped out by the tornado because they didn’t understand what he meant.”

9. Brummagem

Definition: (adjective) cheap, showy, or counterfeit.

As In: “Lady Gaga is hardly original. She is just a more obnoxious Brummagem understudy for Madonna.”

8. Doolally

Definition: (adjective) temporarily deranged or feebleminded.

As In: “Hey, remember that time Tom Cruise went doolally on Oprah’s couch?”

7. Jactitation

Definition: (noun) [1] the restless tossing of the body in illness. [2] The twitching of a limb or muscle.

As In: “Someone call an ambulance! This woman is experiencing severe jactitation! Oh, wait, no, she’s just dancing.”

6. Bunghole

Definition: (noun) an aperture through which a cask can be filled or emptied.

As In: “I’m trying to empty my cask, but the bunghole seems to be blocked.”

5. Suctorial

Definition: (adjective) adapted for sucking.

As In: “Don’t get me wrong, I love the Cubbies, but they haven’t won the World Series since 1908. How did they get so suctorial?”

Source

4. Zeugma

Definition: (noun) a figure of speech in which a word applies to two others in different senses or to two others of which it semantically suits only one.

As In: “Both how I’m living and my nose is large.” –Humpty Hump

3. Gallimaufrey

Definition: (noun) a confused jumble or medley of things.

As In: “The other day I heard a guy on NPR call Congress a ‘calamitous gallimaufry.’ Man, what a sesquipedalian prick.”

2. Sitzfleisch

Definition: (noun) [1] power to endure or to persevere in an activity. [2] The ability to sit through or tolerate something boring.

As In: “Man, it’s gonna take some serious sitzfleisch to get through this whole Tyler Perry movie.”

1. Floccinaucinihilipilification

Definition: (noun) the action or habit of estimating something as worthless.

As In: “Each year the National Academy of Recording Arts and Sciences unintentionally practices the art of floccinaucinihilipilification by holding the Grammy Awards.” Or, used as a verb: “Man, that guy who writes those lists for oddballdaily.com is such a jerk—he’s always floccinaucinihilipilificating things I happen to like.”

Sources: The New Oxford American Dictionary, and here