Even though theyâ€™ve been playing Christmas music through those tinny speakers at the grocery store since November 1, today the real countdown to everyone’s favorite holiday begins in earnest. This means that, finally, you can actually start listening to Christmas music without people thinking youâ€™re some kind of weirdoâ€”unless you happen to be listening to one these Christmas albums, that is.
To start December off right, today Oddball Daily brings you a list of some of the weirdest Christmas albums you will ever come across. Itâ€™s hardly definitive, but it seems highly unlikely that you could find anything more bizarre that the titles that make up this list.
Just a quick WARNING warning before getting started: some of these are probably NSFW.
9. Christmas on Death Row (Various Artists)
Nothing warms the soul and puts you in the giving spirit like gangsta rap, so itâ€™s only natural that Death Row Recordsâ€”the biggest hip-hop label of the 1990sâ€”would produce a Christmas CD featuring their biggest artists. This particular song is called â€œSanta Clause Goes Straight to the Ghetto,â€ and is performed by Snoop Dogg, Nate Dogg, Tray Deee, and Bad Azz.
The album also features gems such as â€œChristmas in the Ghettoâ€ by O.F.T.B. and â€œParty 4 Da Homiesâ€ by J-Flexx, as well as versions of Christmas standards like â€œSilent Night,â€ â€œFrosty the Snowman,â€ and â€œHave Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.â€ So, yeah, itâ€™s kinda all over the place.
8. 8-Bit Jesus (Doctor Octoroc)
This album combines the two great loves of my childhood: Christmas and Nintendo. It was created by Philadelphia-based musician and artist Levi â€œDoctor Octorocâ€ Buffum back in 2008. As he explains, “8-Bit Jesus is an album of classic Christmas songs arranged in the style of classic video games for the Nintendo Entertainment System.”
Kind of makes you wonder why they donâ€™t make Christmas video games? God know they make Christmas everything else.
7. Oy to the World! A Klezmer Christmas (The Klezmonauts)
Klezmer is the name for a type of Jewish folk music from Eastern Europe, and the Klezmonauts are a Welsch Klezmer band. Their album â€œOy to the World!â€ is, therefore, an album of Jewish Christmas songs.
I guess you could consider it a form â€œinterfaith dialogueâ€; personally, I just consider it weird.
6. A Colt 45 Christmas (Afroman)
Joseph Edgar Foreman, better known as Afroman, has made a pretty good living for himself as a rapper considering he only makes songs about getting stoned. His wonderful Christmas album, â€œA Colt 45 Christmas,â€ will surely warm your hearth this winter. If you donâ€™t believe me, just take a listen to this song. Itâ€™s called â€œO Chronic Tree.â€
5. Cosmic Christmas (Eban Schletter)
Eban Schletter makes a living writing scores and songs for television shows (Spongebob Squarepants) and movies (Dumb and Dumber: When Harry Met Lloyd). But Iâ€™m pretty sure he made this experimental â€œCosmic Christmasâ€ nonsense just to piss people off.
4. Winter Songs (Rob Halford)
Almost every popular music act from the last 50 years has made a Christmas album. So I think weâ€™re all used to some pretty stupid holiday music by now.
Still, nothing could have prepared me for this concept: a Christmas album by the lead singer of legendary heavy metal band Judas Priest.
In this clip we have Rob Halfordâ€™s take on the classic, â€œO Holy Night.â€ Because nothing sounds â€œholierâ€ than 7 fuzzy guitar tracks.
3. Christmas in the Stars: Star Wars Christmas Album
In recent years, the anger directed at George Lucas by hardcore Star Wars purists has reached a fever pitch as heâ€™s tweaked and edited and â€œruinedâ€ his classic films all for the sake of repackaging them and selling to a new generation.
But sometimes I think these hardcore fans forget that George Lucas didnâ€™t become a corporate shill just yesterday. The merchandising blitz that accompanied the original release of the original films was unprecedented in its day. And this 1980 Christmas album is a perfect example.
Thanks, George. We all really wanted to hear C-3PO banter with R2-D2 while a choir sings â€œSleigh Rideâ€ in the background.
2. Tiny Timâ€™s Christmas Album (Tiny Tim)
Tiny Tim was probably the worldâ€™s most famous Ukulele-playing weirdo. He became famous after appearances (which may or may not have been tongue-in-cheek) on shows like Laugh-in and The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and was the butt of jokes for a long, long time. In 1994, he released â€œTiny Timâ€™s Christmas Album,â€ which instantly became a bizarro Christmas classic.
Hereâ€™s another song from the album…it was too hard to choose just one:
1. Meowy Chirstmas (Jingle Cats)
Of course the #1 weirdest Christmas album is the Jingle Cats. Yes, the whole concept is a goof, I realize. But itâ€™s still the weirdest way to enjoy the holidays. Or should I say, the Meow-idays. Bah dum dum.