February 8, 2016

9 Weird Christmas Albums To Put You In The Holiday Spirit

weird christmas albums
Even though they’ve been playing Christmas music through those tinny speakers at the grocery store since November 1, today the real countdown to everyone’s favorite holiday begins in earnest. This means that, finally, you can actually start listening to Christmas music without people thinking you’re some kind of weirdo—unless you happen to be listening to one these Christmas albums, that is.

To start December off right, today Oddball Daily brings you a list of some of the weirdest Christmas albums you will ever come across. It’s hardly definitive, but it seems highly unlikely that you could find anything more bizarre that the titles that make up this list.

Just a quick WARNING warning before getting started: some of these are probably NSFW.

Happy holidays!

9. Christmas on Death Row (Various Artists)

Nothing warms the soul and puts you in the giving spirit like gangsta rap, so it’s only natural that Death Row Records—the biggest hip-hop label of the 1990s—would produce a Christmas CD featuring their biggest artists. This particular song is called “Santa Clause Goes Straight to the Ghetto,” and is performed by Snoop Dogg, Nate Dogg, Tray Deee, and Bad Azz.

The album also features gems such as “Christmas in the Ghetto” by O.F.T.B. and “Party 4 Da Homies” by J-Flexx, as well as versions of Christmas standards like “Silent Night,” “Frosty the Snowman,” and “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas.” So, yeah, it’s kinda all over the place.

8. 8-Bit Jesus (Doctor Octoroc)

This album combines the two great loves of my childhood: Christmas and Nintendo. It was created by Philadelphia-based musician and artist Levi “Doctor Octoroc” Buffum back in 2008. As he explains, “8-Bit Jesus is an album of classic Christmas songs arranged in the style of classic video games for the Nintendo Entertainment System.”

Kind of makes you wonder why they don’t make Christmas video games? God know they make Christmas everything else.

7. Oy to the World! A Klezmer Christmas (The Klezmonauts)

Klezmer is the name for a type of Jewish folk music from Eastern Europe, and the Klezmonauts are a Welsch Klezmer band. Their album “Oy to the World!” is, therefore, an album of Jewish Christmas songs.

I guess you could consider it a form “interfaith dialogue”; personally, I just consider it weird.

6. A Colt 45 Christmas (Afroman)

Joseph Edgar Foreman, better known as Afroman, has made a pretty good living for himself as a rapper considering he only makes songs about getting stoned. His wonderful Christmas album, “A Colt 45 Christmas,” will surely warm your hearth this winter. If you don’t believe me, just take a listen to this song. It’s called “O Chronic Tree.”

5. Cosmic Christmas (Eban Schletter)

Eban Schletter makes a living writing scores and songs for television shows (Spongebob Squarepants) and movies (Dumb and Dumber: When Harry Met Lloyd). But I’m pretty sure he made this experimental “Cosmic Christmas” nonsense just to piss people off.

4. Winter Songs (Rob Halford)

Almost every popular music act from the last 50 years has made a Christmas album. So I think we’re all used to some pretty stupid holiday music by now.

Still, nothing could have prepared me for this concept: a Christmas album by the lead singer of legendary heavy metal band Judas Priest.

In this clip we have Rob Halford’s take on the classic, “O Holy Night.” Because nothing sounds “holier” than 7 fuzzy guitar tracks.

3. Christmas in the Stars: Star Wars Christmas Album

In recent years, the anger directed at George Lucas by hardcore Star Wars purists has reached a fever pitch as he’s tweaked and edited and “ruined” his classic films all for the sake of repackaging them and selling to a new generation.

But sometimes I think these hardcore fans forget that George Lucas didn’t become a corporate shill just yesterday. The merchandising blitz that accompanied the original release of the original films was unprecedented in its day. And this 1980 Christmas album is a perfect example.

Thanks, George. We all really wanted to hear C-3PO banter with R2-D2 while a choir sings “Sleigh Ride” in the background.

2. Tiny Tim’s Christmas Album (Tiny Tim)

Tiny Tim was probably the world’s most famous Ukulele-playing weirdo. He became famous after appearances (which may or may not have been tongue-in-cheek) on shows like Laugh-in and The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and was the butt of jokes for a long, long time. In 1994, he released “Tiny Tim’s Christmas Album,” which instantly became a bizarro Christmas classic.

Here’s another song from the album…it was too hard to choose just one:

1. Meowy Chirstmas (Jingle Cats)

Of course the #1 weirdest Christmas album is the Jingle Cats. Yes, the whole concept is a goof, I realize. But it’s still the weirdest way to enjoy the holidays. Or should I say, the Meow-idays. Bah dum dum.